Week 37: 37 Thoughts

1. The women in my office had a shower-like lunch for me yesterday. It was low-key, but they bought the baby some duck-themed books and bath stuff. Seeing as I haven't had a shower at all, I was touched by it.

2. The Mister came to work the other day and helped me clean out my desk. I have a lot of books and personal items on my desk that I wanted to bring home.

3. Am trying to get some work done (I'm actually leaving the office just before the next busy period) and float between trying to be productive so I can get through the day, and cleaning out years of old emails and files on my computer to make sure I can access what I need after I'm no longer working at that computer/desk every day.

4. Yesterday, after the nice shower, I got a few go-Lyrehca emails. One was from a former freelancer I trained and who left my publication to move to New York and picked up a lot of freelance work right away. She told me that working for me was like being in a Master's program and that she quickly got promoted because of the quality of her work.

5. The second was from one of the magazines I freelance for and recently told I was going on a hiatus to have the kid. The magazine has a new section editor who was told by the editor I had worked for that I was a great worker, and that whenever I was ready to get back into freelancing for them after the baby's arrival, to please get in touch.

6. I love getting emails or getting praise like that.

7. At work itself, one of my coworkers told me she was going to really miss me while I was out, since she considered me the glue of the magazine.

8. Honestly, I don't hear a lot of stuff like that, particularly from the top boss at the place. Our priorities (mine and the top boss's) are pretty far apart, and as a result, we don't interact all that much. Plus, I sense that our styles are pretty different.

9. Beyond work glory, I've determined, perhaps weeks or months later than most, that pregnancy can be really hard on the body. Particularly in the final weeks.

10. As Mr. Lyrehca pointed out, some women vomit for three months straight, and I didn't have any of that.

11. But in the last week alone, my ankles and legs have gotten bigger, I've dealt with the sheer annoyance and pain of a hemorrhoid, and two days ago, my left kneecap developed this sharp arthritis-like pain (I suspect this is what arthritis feels like).

12. It hurts to go up and down stairs, and it's only on one knee, in the front. (Knee pain in the back would indicate a scary blood clot, and I'm told this isn't a clot).

13. One the first day, two Tylenol did nothing for the knee pain, but yesterday and today, it seems to have lessened in intensity a bit.

14. Due to Passover, I've eaten more of carb-heavy foods over the past few days.

15. My blood sugars have reflected this, despite my efforts to take more boluses to cover them.

16. I fear this is packing weight on the kid for the last week in utero.

17. Sigh.

18. Today I've scheduled the last of my prenatal massages at lunchtime. I'm deeply looking forward to this.

19. Friday is my last day at work.

20. We still need to buy a bassinet mattress for next week.

21. My home office is still cluttered, and it's hard to get motivated to declutter it before next week.

22. I've been up for a few hours (it's nearly 6am) even though my blood sugar was 89 when I went to bed and 94 when I awoke around 4ish.

23. It took several days, after weeks of prodding from Mr. L., but I finally pulled together a huge list of email addresses for everyone we want to announce our baby news to next week.

24. I try not to think about what we'll do should something (knock wood) not go anything but well.

25. I wonder what the baby is going to look like.

26. I wonder if I'll ever feel well-rested again over the next year.

26. I wonder if my assorted health complaints will somehow disappear next week, or if I'm living with cankles, hemorrhoids and left knee pain for the duration.

27. I have thought that despite all my worrying about the baby's potential for health problems (diabetes! autism! ADHD! Something else I haven't thought of yet), that having the baby in utero has kept things limited. Once the baby is here, the reality will be staring me (crying, hungry, tired, in need of a diaper change) straight in the face.

28. It was snowing here yesterday. On April 4.

29. All the clothes I've bought for Baby L. aren't snow-ready.

30. Once the baby arrives, I suspect my mother will go into baby overload and buy the kid whatever cold-weather gear it may still need by the second week in April.

31. I lay in bed earlier tonight and noted the lack of abdominal pain I was feeling, to try to remember how it feels next week when I'm recovering from another abdominal scar and more pain.

32. I totally forgot about this and this deserves a post of its own, but Laurie at A Chronic Dose mentioned me on her blog last week as someone who always makes her think. I need to write more about this at length, particuarly because this post isn't much more than a brain dump, but thanks (again!) to Laurie.

33. I turned 37 last week. It was sort of a low-key birthday in light of where I am in the pregnancy.

34. I just felt the baby kick.

35. It's very reassuring when this happens.

36. I have another hour before I need to start readying for work.

37. I think I'll head back to bed while I still can.